My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
