Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
