i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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