my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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