Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go