Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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