girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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