I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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