My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize