I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
