So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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