Don't you send me to vm
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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