your thong is hanging out like whoa
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I can text with my tongue
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize