Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
