You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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