he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize