I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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