just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize