After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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