then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
