we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
