To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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