He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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