I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.