dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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