Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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