ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
