It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
