We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
