So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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