He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
