he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize