Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Have a good day. My vagina shrank.

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  (734): Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember. (734): Have a good day. My vagina shrank. http://tfl.nu/3o44
  Replies (7) Good night (685) Bad night (1825)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS

  (210): View more from Texas

  Put my glitter back.

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  (214): Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS (210): Put my glitter back. http://tfl.nu/4pgc
  Replies (16) Good night (3323) Bad night (670)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.

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  (360): I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high. http://tfl.nu/uw52
  Replies (12) Good night (3347) Bad night (950)
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  (949): View more from California

  I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage

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  (949): I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage http://tfl.nu/tvaz
  Replies (45) Good night (3920) Bad night (786)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  it happened again.

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  (973): remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels? (973): it happened again. http://tfl.nu/jmjg
  Replies (8) Good night (6199) Bad night (945)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.

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  (775): You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes. http://tfl.nu/wxud
  Replies (22) Good night (1278) Bad night (5071)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  How did you break your hand eating pizza?

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Boxes are hard to see rocks through.

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  (603): Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza. (1-603): How did you break your hand eating pizza? (603): Boxes are hard to see rocks through. http://tfl.nu/kquz
  Replies (7) Good night (2712) Bad night (889)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it

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  (952): On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it http://tfl.nu/wltj
  Replies (6) Good night (2799) Bad night (971)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.

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  (417): Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go. http://tfl.nu/8zsf
  Replies (15) Good night (2142) Bad night (812)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.

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  (520): Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded. http://tfl.nu/om7e
  Replies (9) Good night (3562) Bad night (1366)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.

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  (609): I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception. http://tfl.nu/z6mj
  Replies (13) Good night (1916) Bad night (1369)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...

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  (770): Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less... http://tfl.nu/7jyd
  Replies (5) Good night (1578) Bad night (645)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.

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  (918): Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want. http://tfl.nu/d7n8
  Replies (4) Good night (1554) Bad night (520)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.

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  (952): He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy. http://tfl.nu/1isp
  Replies (5) Good night (1055) Bad night (633)
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  (445): View more from Pennsylvania

  We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing

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  (445): We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing http://tfl.nu/ir7s
  Replies (6) Good night (1046) Bad night (467)

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