Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She's the barista slut.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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