he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Randomize
