You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize