We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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