I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
