He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
