I'd wear matching sweaters with you
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
