Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize