Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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