Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
