No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
