And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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