I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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