I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize