I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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