She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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