So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
