he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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